February 1, 2011 by Lois Lane
Lois Lane here, reporting in for a news brief. I’ve received an electronic message in my in-box (firstname.lastname@example.org) from a blogger who needs to vent. All vents/grievances/complaints are anonymous. My source will never be revealed-so don’t ask. Read at your own risk-some of these vents may cause you to shift in your seat. So take care in commenting, and remember sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can hurt like hell.
Required Reading before leaving a comment: Record Rules. Capiche?
A little background before I start. My husband and I have been together for 13 years, married for 9. We’ve had the same group of friends for a while longer (I met him through a mutual friend). From the beginning, Hubby and I talked about having children while the other 2 couples were against having children. You can see where this is going right? You guessed it, these 2 couples now each have a child and Hubby and I have 3 cats and 2 dogs. We’ve been TTC for 8 years and these couples are totally aware of our situation.
My birthday was last month and per tradition, we all got together for breakfast. Well of course when we arrived it was the normal “Hi, How are you? What’s been going on? How’s work?” when the small talk was exhausted the conversation turned to the children – “How much does she weigh now? What food won’t he eat? How do you handle whatever?” So then the topic turned to getting the kids to try something new or trying new food and I said, “Well I can tell you how I give my dog a pill by opening his mouth and shoving the pill down his throat.” Just a subtle reminder that I had nothing to offer to the conversation and maybe it might be nice to switch to a new topic. It worked for a little while and then back to the kids. My husband and I sat there looking at each other. So not only am I reminded that I am yet another year older, I’m also reminded that we don’t have have children. It just frustrates me so much because these are the same people who 10 years ago would groan and roll their eyes if we were out to dinner and child would be sat next to us because they didn’t want to hear “it” cry.
I love my friends and I don’t want to lose them, but it’s so hard to be around them. They don’t mean to exclude us, but they just don’t think about how it makes Hubby and me feel.